Category: Awesome

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Genie-us Comment

| UT, USA | Awesome, Family & Kids

(I’m at The Nutcracker with two friends and their daughter. There are a lot of small children in the audience for obvious reasons. During the second act, dancers representing different “nationalities” perform for the main character. As the Arabian dance starts, a very little girl behind me screams at the man wearing a turban and “traditional” clothing.)

Child: “Mommy! It’s the genie!”

(Whoever mommy is, hats off to her for raising an imaginative daughter. Every adult around her had a good laugh, though.)

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Not Feline This Weirdness

| Canada | Awesome, Bizarre/Silly

(I am 12. My family goes on a cross-country road trip. We stay with friends and family instead of in hotels. We arrive at one place, and I and my stepsister (who is also 12) get out of the car. The woman we are staying with comes over to greet us.)

Woman: “Look at you! I just want to knock your heads together like two cats!”

(Which she did. Very gently. No, she didn’t have any cats, but she did let us drive her ride-on mower.)

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A Non-Working Lunch

| NY, USA | Awesome, Popular, Strangers

(I’m picking up a pizza at a local pizzeria for my workmates. I’m wearing a polo with my company’s logo on it, and sitting at one of the tables waiting for my food. I’m kind of out of it because the morning’s work was labor intensive, so I’m staring idly at the drink cooler. An older gentleman walks in smiling, he greets me, and walks up to the counter behind me to look at a menu.)

Customer: “You know, I think I’ll get a meatball sandwich.” *he’s clearly talking to me since the owner has gone to the back to get my food*

(The customer seems very nice, and is obviously waiting for a reply.)

Me: “Oh, okay. The food’s good here, right?”

Customer: “Yep! I love it!”

(There’s a bit of a pause.)

Customer: “Do you have time to make it now?”

(It dawns on me he thinks I work here.)

Me: “Oh! I’m sorry. I don’t work here. I’m just waiting for my lunch.”

Customer: “Oh! Sorry! I thought you were watching TV.”

(I notice there’s a monitor above the drink cooler.)

Me: “Nope! Just watching the drinks cool.”

(He gives me a confused look, which I understand because my joke wasn’t that funny. Another minute goes by.)

Customer: “I know it’s your lunch break, but would you mind finding someone else to take my order? I’m sorry to bother you.”

(I wonder if he didn’t hear me the first time, but he’s so nice I don’t want to make him feel bad.)

Me: “I don’t think they would like me to go behind the counter since I don’t work here. I work for [Company], and I’m just picking up lunch. Hopefully the owner will be back in a second to take your order.”

Customer: “No problem! Sorry about that!”

Me: “No worries.”

(After another moment the owner comes back. He takes the man’s order and chats with him as another worker makes the sandwich. The customer then turns to point at me.)

Customer: “Let me just say you have just a nice employee! This girl is so kind and polite, and was very patient with me!”

Owner: “Oh, she doesn’t work for me. She’s a customer just like you.”

(The other worker hands me my food and I can see light finally dawning on the older gentleman.)

Customer: “I’m so very sorry!”

Me: “What are you apologizing for? You were complimenting me. It was nice meeting you!”

(We shook hands and I left with my food, in a better mood than when I came.)

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Solving Multiple Daddy Issues

| San Jose, CA, USA | Awesome, Family & Kids, Popular

(My best friend at work recently found out his father is in very poor health and doesn’t have much time left. He’s been processing the news and figuring out how to approach the situation; they haven’t seen each other in years and live about a thousand miles apart. He’s also been the type to always look out for himself; he doesn’t like having to rely on anyone else. We don’t have the same positions at our workplace. I make more than him as well as having a second job that tires me out, but pays an almost embarrassing amount for the hours I put in.)

Me: “I’m not trying to tell you what to do because I can’t do that, and also nobody can because you’re a grown man and stubborn as hell but… You should go see your dad.”

Friend: “I know… I don’t have much time off banked, though.”

Me: “Yeah… I know you’d talked to [Manager] about what’s going on, so I may have asked if we can transfer or donate PTO like at some workplaces, because I have a ton and never use it. There isn’t a way to do that, but he said if you ask he can put in a couple fake training days for you to help you cover.” *meaning: submit paperwork so the company pays him like he went to school even though he didn’t*

Friend: “Wow, that’s really cool of him. I still don’t know if I’d be able to swing it, though. It’s a lot of money.”

Me: “Don’t let that stop you; I’ll cover whatever you need. You’ll regret it forever if you don’t go and I don’t want that for you. Just let me know.”

Friend: “Oh, sweetheart. I really appreciate that, but we both know I won’t take you up on it. I gotta have my pride. I’ll figure something out; I always do.”

Me: “Of course. But hon, we ALSO both know I get paid a STUPID amount of money.”

Friend: *laughs* “Yeah, you do.”

Me: “So I gotta put it out there. Just in case.”

(He’s started planning the trip.)

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Santasaurus

| CA, USA | Awesome, Holidays, Popular

(I have just gotten a teal scarf with dinosaurs wearing Santa hats on it.)

Friend: “[My Name], what the f*** is that scarf?”

Me: “It’s amazing, that’s what.”

Friend: “I want ten.”

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