Category: Family & Kids

The Real Boss Is The Four-Year-Old

| Norway | Family & Kids, Popular

(I’ve recently started working in a small theatre. Only me (in my twenties) and my boss (in his late thirties) are employed on a regular basis; everyone else is just hired for each project. One day my boss’ four-year-old daughter is there with us. I take care of her as her father goes to a different floor.)

Four-Year-Old: “Who’s the boss here, you or my dad?”

Me: “Your dad is my boss. He’s everyone’s boss here.”

Four-Year-Old: “No way! He can’t be the boss of [One of the Actors on a current project, in his fifties]! He is the boss of everything; he’s definitely my dad’s boss!”

(I told the actor what she had said and he was super pleased and said he’d always known the four-year-old was very smart.)

Unsocial Worker

| MO, USA | Coworkers, Family & Kids, Popular

(I’m with my husband at his work holiday party, trying to chat with people I have never met before. This is not a strong suit of mine. Talking with one coworker’s wife, this conversation occurs)

Me: “What is your daughter studying?”

Coworker’s Wife: *sigh* “Teaching English!”

Me: “Oh, cool. Why the eye roll?”

Coworker’s Wife: “I’m a social worker, for God’s sake. I wanted her to DO something with her life! Make some MONEY!”

Me: “…”

Behavior Fit For A Toilet

| ON, Canada | Family & Kids, Ignoring/Inattentive, Popular, Strangers

(I am around seven or eight, at a restaurant with my dad. I go to the bathroom. I go into a stall and sit down, when I hear someone walk in.)

Lady: *knocks on the door to my stall*

Me: “I’m in here!”

(I’m pretty loud when speaking, so I think she hears me.)

Lady: “Hello? Anyone in there?”

Me: “I’m in here! Please don’t come in!”

(I think that’s the end of it, but I hear her step back, and she Sparta-kicks the door open, breaking the lock in the process! I quickly put my hands on my lap and lean down slightly, and then look at her. She has her small child with her, and she stares at me like someone just put a plate of rotting garbage under her nose.)

Lady: “Ugh, stupid kids.” *to her child* “Let’s try in the other stalls. I’m sure there isn’t a dumb kid in there. Not like you, my little angel.”

(She then walked off to the next stall without so much as an apology. I struggled to close the door with my tiny child legs while finishing up, and then I washed my hands and left. A little while later when my dad and I were getting ready to leave, I looked over to the other side of the restaurant. The kid from the washroom was throwing a huge temper tantrum, including throwing food and utensils, and the mother was getting glares from everyone else around them. As we left, I saw the mother getting a talking to by the owner! Sweet justice!)

Genie-us Comment

| UT, USA | Awesome, Family & Kids, Popular

(I’m at The Nutcracker with two friends and their daughter. There are a lot of small children in the audience for obvious reasons. During the second act, dancers representing different “nationalities” perform for the main character. As the Arabian dance starts, a very little girl behind me screams at the man wearing a turban and “traditional” clothing.)

Child: “Mommy! It’s the genie!”

(Whoever mommy is, hats off to her for raising an imaginative daughter. Every adult around her had a good laugh, though.)

Bikes Versus Yikes

, | NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Popular, Strangers

(I’m about six in the story, in the food court at our local mall. My parents go to pay and I wander off. A biker finds me.)

Biker: “Now, son, where are your parents?”

Me: “I don’t know!” *sniffle*

Biker: “We’ll find ’em! What do they look—”

(Suddenly, he is cut off by an abrupt shriek.)

Woman #1: “That gangster is taking that kid!”

Biker: “No, this kid just—”

Woman #1: “I don’t care! You were going to kidnap him! HELP!”

(Security wanders over and my parents see the ruckus from the food court.)

Security: “What’s going on here?”

Biker: “I’m trying to help—”

Woman #1: “This guy is taking this kid!”

My Mom: “[My Name], are you okay?”

Woman #1: “Obviously not! This gangster was going to take this kid!” *points at biker* “Arrest him!”

Woman #2: “Actually, I watched the whole thing. This man was just trying to help the kid find his parents, when you started shrieking.”

(Woman #2 was thanked and the shrieking one went home embarrassed! That biker is a friend of my family now, and is in fact very sweet!)

Page 1/6512345...Last