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Bed Wetter

| NY, USA | Crazy Requests, Popular, Roommates

(I return to my dorm room mid-morning to find my roommate and her boyfriend there. He looks exhausted.)

Roommate: “Oh, hey, [My Name], is it okay if [Boyfriend] sleeps in your bed? The sprinklers malfunctioned in his room and woke him up, and his bed is all wet.”

Me: “Erm – can’t he sleep in YOUR bed?”

Roommate: “I just washed all the blankets and he’s kinda wet still, see?”

Me: “No. Just… no. Sorry, [Boyfriend].”

(I had been planning to go to the library, but instead I crawled on to my bed to work to make sure she didn’t stick him in it as soon as I left!)

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The New Dorm-al

| Louisville, KY, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Dorms, Popular

(I recently moved into a student apartment in the middle of the year. I had heard rumors that the girls who used to live there were kicked out after getting busted during a crazy night of sex and drugs. I’m woken up on a Saturday morning to a knock on the door. I open it up to find some guy standing there. Since I just woke up, I’m only wearing an undershirt and a pair of boxers.)

Me: “Uh… Hello?”

Guy: “Hey, is [Girl] here?”

Me: “Um… sorry. She doesn’t live here anymore.”

Guy: “Oh. Okay.” *leaves*

(The fact that he didn’t look the least bit surprised to find some strange guy in his underwear answering the door of what he thought was a girl’s room seemed to confirm the rumors.)

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Noticed A Couple Things

| Australia | Roommates

(My cousin studying in Australia is living in student housing apartments. It has two bedrooms with a bunk bed each. A friend visits their place while the two girls from one bedroom are out, but their door open, which is normal.)

Visitor: “I thought you were all girls here?”

Cousin: “Yeah, we are.”

Visitor: “Oh, I thought that room looked like a couple lives there.”

Girl: “Well, one of them is a tomboy; that’s all.”

Cousin: “I think she’d like that compliment, thanks.”

(She did.)

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Remember To Remember ‘Remember’

, | Coventry, England, UK | Bizarre/Silly, Food & Drink, Popular

(I am at a convention located on a university. The accommodation for it are dorms, so the walls are really thin. I’ve gone to bed “early,” pre-one am, and have been woken up by people having a conversation in the hall outside my door. I can only hear one half the conversation, as the friend is further down the hall and they’re just yelling to each other)

Guy: “What was that?”

(Incoherent muttering.)

Guy: “You want me to remind you to remember to remind [Other Name] to do that? You have asked me to do this whilst drunk. By all means, when I’m sober, if I remember to remind you to remember to remind him, I will do so, but the likelihood of me remembering is low!”

(Most eloquent drunk I’ve ever heard!)

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Must Have Got Your Cables Crossed

, | NY, USA | Popular, Roommates

Roommate: “I went and ordered cable TV. You owe me for half.”

Me: “I didn’t want cable TV.”

Roommate: “Well, you need to pay for half of it.”

Me: “But I didn’t want it.”

Roommate: “You’d better not watch my TV then!”

(So I made a point to not watch … something I didn’t want in the first place, and something she didn’t tell me about until AFTER ordering it!)

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