Category: Bad Behavior

Playing Hunger Games With You

| OH, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Popular

(I am meeting with a group of friends at a local bistro. Since it is a weekday afternoon, I go straight there after work. By the time I arrive, I am famished since I had to take an early lunch break because of shifts and schedules. We all get seated and place our orders; half of us order various signature pasta dishes.)

Waitress: “Here are your orders.” *puts the plates down in front of us*

Me: “Excuse me. This isn’t the one I ordered. I ordered the one with chicken.”

Waitress: “I’m sorry.” *she picks up the plate* “I’ll take this back and make sure you get the right order.” *she leaves*

Friend: *sitting directly across from me* “Oh, this pasta dish is so good! I didn’t order chicken, but this chicken is so delicious!”

Me: *at that point, I realize the waitress had accidentally switched our orders* “That was the dish I ordered.”

Friend: “Really? Oh, but this is so good. And I am so hungry! I’m just going to continue eating this. It tastes SO good!”

(There’s little else I can do at this point since she already had her fork in it other than watch her eat my food and brag about how good it tasted while I listen to my stomach growl.)

Friend: “I should have ordered this instead. It’s wonderful, and I am SO hungry! I’m definitely ordering it next time! It’s SO GOOD!”

(By the time my meal came, everyone else had finished eating.)

Losing Weight And Friends

| Brisbane, QLD, Australia | Bad Behavior, Health & Body, Popular

(A friend and I joined a gym around the same time last year. She started going more often than I did for a short while, then later stopped all together. I had done the same but over the past week I decided to become much more serious with getting fit and losing weight. I also joined an online weight-loss and coaching group.)

Me: “D***, I packed everything but my track pants.”

Friend: “Oh, have you started going back to the gym?”

Me: “Yes. I went on Monday. I also joined [Online Group], too, and have lost two and a half kilos since last week.”

Friend: *sneering at me* “It doesn’t look it.”

Didn’t Bless You With The Gift Of Knowledge

| USA | Bad Behavior, Popular

(I’m chatting with a friend via a social media IM.)

Me: “Huh, your birthday gift got returned to me. I wonder why?”

Friend: “Oh, I forgot to tell you I moved.”

Me: “Well, that would do it. Where’d you move to?”

Friend: “I moved in with my boyfriend three months ago.”

Me: “What boyfriend?!”

Friend: “The guy I met in school last year.”

Me: “Wait, you’re in school?”

Friend: “Yeah. I didn’t want to announce it to everyone so I just kept it quiet.”

Me: “Wait, okay, hang on. I’m actually a little hurt because I’ve specifically asked you SEVERAL TIMES what you’re doing, what’s new, what’s going on. And you never mentioned any of this.”

Friend: “I wasn’t comfortable telling everyone.”

Me: “Well, okay, but you could have at least told me your new address when I told you I was about to mail your gift out.”

Friend: “I just didn’t want to tell everyone!”

Me: “Well… okay, then. Guess I’m keeping your gift!”

Wish He Would Pokémon Go Away

| FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Games, Pokemon, Popular

(I’m waiting in a salon for a hair appointment, idly playing a Pokémon game on my handheld. A boy of about ten or so who is waiting with his mother sees and immediately gets excited.)

Kid: “You have Pokémon! Do you want to trade?”

Me: “Haha, sure, if it’s okay with your mom.”

Woman: “Oh, as long as he isn’t bothering you, of course.”

(I open up my Pokémon to find something to trade. I’m not expecting to get anything good; I’m mostly just charmed by the kid’s enthusiasm and the experience, until…)

Kid: *leaning over my shoulder watching me scroll through my Pokémon* “Wow! You have a shiny [Rare Pokémon]! I want that one!”

Me: “That one’s not for trade. But all these—“

(Before I can say anything else, the kid begins screaming in my face. Like someone has flipped a switch, this ten-year-old turns red faced and howling at top volume, with tears streaming down his face, fists bunched angrily at his sides. It’s the sort of wild, hysterical tantrum you’d expect a toddler to throw.)

Woman: “Just give him the stupid thing!”

Me: “Lady, with all due respect, if this is how your kid reacts to being told he can’t have something in a VIDEO GAME, I’m not going to enable him.”

(The salon owner came over and told the woman she needed to control her kid or leave. I missed the resolution of it because I got called back for my hair appointment. As she was leaning me back into the basin to wash my hair for the cut, my stylist murmured, “I don’t know about you, but that made my uterus shrivel up.” You and me both, sister.)

Email Fail: The Spectacular

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Popular, Roommates, Rude & Risque

(Before me, my roommate/friend had another… less stable roommate. He tells me what was the first incident, about half a month in when he thought his roomie wasn’t a bad guy.)

Ex-Roomie: “Hey, can I get your email? I don’t really use many other social Internet stuff. I prefer texts and emails way more.”

Friend: “Sure! It’s [email].”

(Not out of place, especially since my friend does use his email a lot. On another day, they have some free time and my friend is kind of coerced into a conversation about themselves.)

Ex-Roomie: “Sucks that we can’t own any animals besides fish here. Have you ever had any pets?”

Friend: “Not many. I had a dog when I was younger and now my family has two cats.”

Ex-Roomie: “Lucky! What was the dog’s name?”

Friend: “Sparky. Old lab. Miss him, to—“

Ex-Roomie: “Yeah, yeah. Wow, you’re lucky man. Never had pets myself. I grew up in [State]. Where are you from?”

Friend: “Oh, I’m from around here.”

Ex-Roomie: “No, no. Where did you grow up?”

Friend: “Well, not far off from here, near downtown.”

Ex-Roomie: “Oh, yeah, I’ve got some friends that grew up over there, too! Do you know them?”

Friend: “Uh… I wouldn’t really know? What’s their—“

Ex-Roomie: “Aw, come on! You’ve GOTTA know them. What street did you live on?”

Friend: *concerned, but doesn’t know where this is leading* “Uh… [Street]? My, um, family doesn’t live there though, and I only had a handful of fr—“

Ex-Roomie: “Ah, nah. They don’t live around there. Your family doesn’t live here anymore? Where’d they go?”

(This went on for a bit. For my friend, though it felt a bit intrusive, it wasn’t too weird. He’s naturally a shy guy so he thought his roommate was just really inquisitive and wanted to get to know him. However, in hindsight, everything clicked together for the little fiasco that happened later on.)

Ex-Roomie: *swears and storms out of his rooms to open the fridge*

Friend: *eating cereal* “What?”

Ex-Roomie: “YOU F****** LIED TO ME, THAT’S WHAT!” *grabs the gallon of milk and starts to chug as much as he can*

Friend: “Wait, what?”


(He ended up CHUCKING THE MILK TO THE GROUND, spilling it everywhere, and storming back to his room. Apparently, he was trying to break into my friend’s email account because he noticed him using it so much and wanted to prank him by sending d*ck pics to everyone in his contacts. My friend found this out a day later, when the roommate invited all his friends over, got drunk, and all started heckling my friend as if he was the one being the spoil sport about it and “couldn’t take a joke.” That roommate did not last long, especially after some more property damage and when he inappropriately started to hit on the landlord’s daughter and tried blaming it on my friend. My friend is gay, by the way.)

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